I have actually been feeling a lot better recently. I think there are multiple things changing around and internally that are contributing to this. I give credit in part to some of the people around me and to my attempts to be more open, and partially because I have started forcing myself to do things that are good and healthy for me, even if I am having demotivating thoughts. In that, I have started doing art again.

So, I usually have like 2 weeks where I will feel motivated to draw and what not, and then I’ll go a couple months before I ever pick up a pen or pencil again. I think though, that the art I make is something I am genuinely really proud of, and I know that when I start creating something, I will really get into it until I make something worthwhile. This gives me a really good feeling that kinda tells me that regardless of the other bad thoughts in my head, I have something that I made that is good, something I can be proud of, and something that makes me happy.

Here is my most recent drawing:

I drew from inspiration of my own drawing that I did years ago (posted at the very bottom) but I definitly think that now I was able to add much more feeling and depth to it. I tried to keep it relatively simple as to keep most of the attention on the eye itself. I really like doing scumbling for the shading, especially when drawing with pen. It really just feels so much more free moving. I like how when you sort of step back from the drawing everything blends together in a really satisfying gradient, while still giving texture, and when you look up close you can really see how intricate the lines are, and see how they move into each other as one continuous stroke.

I tried incorporating an interesting texture to get a sort of foggy illusion, however, this was only done after I accidentally smudged the page while erasing pencil lines. I had not waited long enough before using my kneaded eraser to get rid of some of the guide lines, and it accidentally carried the ink with it onto a blank part of the paper. I was really mad at myself for about 30 seconds before I realized that I could make a pretty unique texture with it. I proceeded to draw on my kneaded eraser while molding it into different shapes and just let the fog slowly creep up the page. In the end, I am really glad that I accidentally messed up right as I finished, because I think it added something more dynamic to the drawing.

I apologize for how long I went on about the techniques and what not, its just not something I get to talk about very often without feeling pretentious, even though in reality I’m just genuinely passionate about art. I have a lot of other stuff on my Pinterest which I have linked down below.

Something I have really wanted to do for a long while is make some form of clothing or accessory with my art printed on it. However, I’m not sure how to actually go about getting my stuff printed and sold and I don’t feel confident enough yet that people would buy it to actually jump into trying. I think its definitely something that I’ll pursue in the very near future though. For now, I want to get more drawings that just look really clean and that are simple enough to print on something like a hat, t-shirt, or tote bag.

But please, check out my Pinterest, let me know what you think about some of my work, I would love any feedback. Thank you for reading, I am glad I got a change of pace in here from what I have been writing recently. I hope there’s an audience that appreciates this type of post as well. I really want to get a group of at least a few people that keep returning every once in a while to check in on new posts. Again, thank you so much for reading (please go check out my Pinterest), I look forward to how things are going, and I look forward to writing about it as well. Thank you.

With all hopes of future joys,

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